After watching Meg's post today about her son's time trials on the motorcycle, I got to thinking.
I mentioned to her that I would never be able to watch my kids do that type of thing.
One of my worst traits as a mother has got to be my over-protectiveness. I struggle with so many things with having boys. I try very hard to let them be boys, but at the same time I try even hard to not let them do anything dangerous.
Hubby wanted the boys to play football. I never did. They are in the band instead. My boys have always been small for their age and I am afraid they will get hurt. I am not talking about simple bumps and bruises type hurt. My fear is more of the break-your-neck-end-up-paralyzed type hurt.
Over the 4th weekend, hubby let the kids do a few fireworks. Nothing big, just some things they have for kids. Not sparklers - they freak me out. But I was still a nervous wreck the entire time. I was sure someone was going to get hurt and we would be in the ER by the end of the night.
I am not so over protective that they don't get to do anything. But when I do let them do things I am a bundle of nerves until they are done.
Amusement parks without me, I am on pins and needles all day.
Camp without me, I need (NEED) to hear from them at least once a day (thank God for texting and cell phones).
Even when they are staying over night somewhere, I have to hear from them before bed and again in the morning. (Sadly, even at Grandma's I am this way).
If I go away without them I NEED to call home several times throughout the day to check on them. It drives hubby nuts!
Teen is seriously considering going to DeVry in Florida for college. I will be a mess.
My kids Do Not have Seperation Anxiety - I do! Well except for Little S, he does have some SA, that is why he goes to preschool.
So now that I have admitted I am a complete freak, what is the worst trait you have as a parent?
And please tell me I am not the only one like this!
Stacy
2 comments:
I think every parent is that way; over-protective. There are things that Jenna does that we know might hurt her briefly, but how else she is going to learn, ya know? It's such a fine line of boudaries....
I'm more protective than my mother was (of course, it was a "safer" time) but less than you, so I think I've found a balance we can all live with.
I steadfastly put my foot down over contact sports- no football, soccer, etc- & fortunately Chris didn't fight me on it (mostly because he's now paying the price for his own sports years- bad knees, shoulder, back); then spectacularly backtracked by letting Sam get involved in karate :-S That was more for his protection, since he's also small for his age, but turns out he's good (a 1st degree blackbelt who has been teaching for over a year), so I just drop him off & ask not to be told what they did that day :-)
That's how I survive- the kids all do extreme sports, they just know not to tell me about it or ask me to come watch (I would be a wreak- I can't even watch Sam play tennis cause I get nervous over him losing) They are all adults (or will be in less then 6 months) with a certain level of sense- Robb using all his safety gear every single time & only rides at the track (he says the streets are too dangerous :-P) Also, the guys both know & serve the Lord, so should the unthinkable happen, they will be whole with Him.
All that being said, time & age (both your's & their's) will help you cope- just remember that what you are raising them up to be is functional, productive, independent adults, so letting them go is the ultimate goal of parenting :-)
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